I love yard sales


It’s been a while since I’ve posted in the blog, but I saw the post from Matt Randall’s Black Belt Academy about their yard sale today and couldn’t resist.

I love to go to yard sales.  Often there are such interesting items and I have a passion for antiques, mainly because the older people are slower and easier to catch when I’m hungry.

Sometimes, though, I just want a small snack and I’ll ask how much the kids are going for.  Why do people look at me so strangely when I ask?  They advertise ‘everything must go’???  If you aren’t selling the children, why are they there?  Is that just to tease my grumbling stomach?  And, when I ask a simple question, please don’t throw things at me and threaten to call the cops.  Some people can be so rude.

Last summer at a garage sale I tried to buy a 10 year old girl for lunch and a lady threw a toaster at me.  When I put my hand up to block, it ripped off my middle finger.  I still keep it in my pocket so I can pull it out and stick it up at people as I’m leaving.

So far, still no luck on the Zombie Anti-Discrimination Act I sent to Congress.  And, my congressman hasn’t even replied.  Looks like he won’t get my vote next session.  And, at the voting booth they keep trying to tell me I can’t vote because I’m dead.  I try to explain that i’m ‘undead’, but they don’t care.  Just another reason we need that legislation passed.  Please write your congressman and ask them to pass my bill.  Thanks.