A Zombie Thanksgiving

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I’m having my neighbors for Thanksgiving this year.

They don’t know it yet, but they’re on the menu. White meat, dark meat, it all tastes like turkey to me.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Stop by my place for a bite.

zombiethanksgiving

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Zombie Costumes Confuse Me

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Tips On How To Buy The Right Costume

Ok, so all of you folks who think that zombie costumes are cool for Halloween need to realize what that does to me and my friends who are real zombies. It’s confuses the heck out of us! How am I supposed to tell what is good living flesh to eat and what might be a fellow undead? Can you please dress your kids in princess and Star Wars costumes this year?

Thanks, Tyler

boy-zombie-costumeTips On How To Buy The Right Costume
By Idd Aziz

Are you planning of buying a costume for an upcoming event? You need to consider a number of tips. Here are some of the tips that you should consider:

Time

Experts recommend that you should always buy your costume early enough. This is to give you ample time to exchange or fix any flaws it might have before the big event. You should note that costumes come in limited sizes and are sold in specific stores; therefore, you can’t run into any store and get out with a costume.

If you are unsure of the right size for you, you should always order a costume that is a size larger.

Buy With A Return Option

A return policy allows you to return your costume in the event that you don’t like it. If you are unsure of the right costume to go for, you should consider buying from stores with a return policy.

You should note that different stores have different return policies. For example, there are some that require you to pay a restocking fee while others don’t. Most stores will require you to meet the shipping costs. To be on the safe side, you should carefully read the return policies before hitting the buy button.

Go For Used Costumes

Are you planning of attending a party, but are operating on a tight budget? You should consider buying a used costume. The cool thing is that there are many online and offline stores that sell used costumes. When making the purchase you should ensure that the costumes aren’t overly-used.

Buy The Right Accessories

The right accessories greatly determine the look of the costume. For your costume to look like a real costume you should ensure that you use the right accessories. For example, if you have a pirate costume, you should ensure that you have the right sword. If on the other hand you are buying a witch costume, you should buy the right fairy wand or witch’s broom.

Types of costumes

There are many types of costumes that you can buy. The most common ones being:

Religious: are you a religious person? You should go for a religious costume. There are many types of these costumes that you can go for. For example, you can go for a Virgin Mary, Joseph, pharaoh, three wise men, roman solider costume or any other religious person that you like.

Ninja: everything in a ninja costume is black. This includes: pants, top, socks, shoes, gloves, mask and sash. As a ninja you should have a weapon which can be a sword, dagger, start, garrotte, and nun-chuck.

Zombie: zombie costumes are ideal for Halloween parties. The cool thing with these costumes is that you can wear almost anything. For example, you can wear your regular clothes or a suit. All you need to do is to get the clothes a little dirty and tear them in order to give them a grave look.

In addition to dressing in torn clothes, you also need to paint yourself. Some of the colours that you can use are red and green.

Conclusion

These are tips on how to buy the right costume. As rule of thumb you should ensure that you buy from a well-known and reputable store. This calls for you to do your research and identify the best store to buy from. If you don’t have money to buy an already made costume, you should consider making the costume at home. Here you only need to buy the necessary materials.

We sell many types of party costumes such as Halloween Party Dress. We also have Lycra spandex Zentai Suit and many others.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Idd_Aziz

Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse

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Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse – The Definitive Guide (NOT)

Tyler’s Note: This guy really bothers me. I’m contacting my attorney to see what he has to say about this. I mean encouraging you meat bags to get creative in how you kill zombies…well…that’s just rude and I’m sure it violates my rights some how. As soon as I can find my other leg, I’m going to hobble over there and have a chat.  And, that Matt Randall guy is ticking me off, too. I hear he’s been teaching his students zombie killing skills again. I would say that I’m going to give him a piece of my mind, but I really want eat a piece of his.
headshotBy Scott C Storvik

Do you have what it takes to survive in a world that has been overrun with ravenous, flesh-eating zombies? Do you have the intestinal fortitude required to swing the axe or pull the trigger so that you can preserve your rightful place at the top of the food chain and keep the world from being completely engulfed in a full on Zombie Apocalypse? I bet you probably don’t. Well, these are a few tips to help you survive at least a week or two.

Health

This is probably the most important when it comes to surviving the Zombie Plague. Maintaining good health will keep you alive and in a positive frame of mind. It will keep you focused on the task at hand, which is the complete and utter destruction of the vast zombie hoards that will spring up seemingly out of nowhere in the next 5 to 10 years. Here are a few points to ponder for your over-all health:

Eat plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. Zombies hate the taste of fresh vegetables in human flesh. Vegetables and fruit are completely the opposite of what zombies want in there diet. They want MEAT, and that is why they are chasing you in the first place.

Keep your cardio and stamina at peak levels. Contrary to what you may have seen in horror movies, zombies can move impossibly fast. You would think that when you break it’s legs it would slow it down, but that is not the case. You see, because zombies are, for all intents and purposes, dead, they feel no pain. Breaking the appendages of zombies only makes them angrier and hungrier, and when they get hungry, they want meat (see first point). So they are going to chase you until they get you or something else that is equally meaty. Your friend perhaps? So, you want to keep your cardio up by constant exercise, and jogging. If you have access to a treadmill, all the better.

Drink your milk. Strong bones are a crucial element to zombie survival. With strong bones you can take the bumps that inevitably come with running from a pack of zombies. If you happen to trip, and roll helplessly down a hill, you stand less of a chance of breaking a vital bone, thereby making yourself an easy target for zombies.

Shooting Zombies

When it comes to a zombie apocalypse, you need to keep one thing in mind: kill or be killed. Zombies are mindless killing machines that will stop at nothing to feed there eternal hunger. You would also be wise to keep in mind that biting you is there way to propagate the species, so…

Don’t be afraid to fire! Keep in mind, the zombies sole intention is eating. It has nothing else to offer society but consumption, so if you have the chance at the shot, take it. There are no bad shots if you hit him, just make sure that they are dead. (see next point)

Shoot Twice. Zombies can only be destroyed be separating there heads from there bodies, or by destroying whatever brain they have left. If the zombie down, carefully and cautiously approach the fallen zombie, place your 12 gauge to its ugly head and pull the trigger. That will end the zombie once and for all.

Have some style! Creativity is not important in zombie survival, but it sure helps to kill the boredom. You can only kill a zombie in so many ways before tire of the same old thing. Mix it up a bit. Set some traps, use different calibers, rely on your training from Road Runner cartoons, try to make it Fun!

These are just a few points to ponder for the next few years. It will come. Zombies are already here, they are just not hungry yet. But when they do become hungry, you will be ready.

*This is a work of fiction cleverly disguised as a self-help guide. Zombies don’t exist, and I don’t endorse the flagrant firearms violations depicted in my story. If I have offended anyone, well, whatever.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Scott_C_Storvik

10 Must Have Herbs For Zombie Survival

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10 Must Have Herbs For Zombie Survival

Tyler’s note: If you find yourself alone in the woods during the zombie apocalypse, use these herbs to keep yourself healthy until I arrive.  I like my meat fresh, not gamey and rotten.  Just saying…don’t judge me.
zombiesBy Sean Fay

First aid and medical supplies are a cornerstone of any zombie survival plan. Without care, even minor injuries and infections can become dangerous, even life-threatening. Herbal medicine is humanity’s oldest form of medicine and is perfectly suited for survival outside of civilization. Nature provides us with a great many tools for caring for ourselves. A well stocked herbal first aid kit, and the knowledge to use it properly, can be an invaluable addition to any zombie planner’s preparations.

First, we’ll address 5 herbal products that any survivor would want to have on hand. These herbs, oils, and extracts are chosen because of their shelf life, versatility, and potency. They can all be stored for extended periods of time, treat a wide variety of health issues, and are small and light enough to carry without strain.

Oregano Oil

Essential oil of Oregano (Origanum vulgare) is a potent anti-septic. A single drop on a bandage can prevent infection in an open wound. Diluted in water it makes an excellent mouthwash or hand sanitizer. Taken internally, Oregano oil will combat bacteria and viruses, supporting your immune system whenever an infection is present. Essential oils have an excellent shelf life, and are used in very small quantities. A single 1oz bottle of Oregano oil takes up minimal space in a bag or pack, and can provide hundreds of doses.

Echinacea Goldenseal Tincture

Tinctures are extracts of herbs in an alcohol base, providing a long shelf life and excellent bio-availability. The combination of Echinacea and Goldenseal creates a powerful immune-supporting and bacteria fighting blend. Take internally to fight fevers and infections of all varieties, or use topically to sterilize injuries or implements.

Osha Tincture

Osha root (Ligusticum porteri) creates a powerful action on the lungs, clearing up coughs and bronchial infections. Osha can also be used to reduce the effects of altitude sickness, and improve oxygenation of the blood. Topically, the tincture can be applied to spider and insect bites, including the dangerous brown recluse. Combined with the next herb on our list, Osha can even benefit aerobic endurance.

Guarana powder

Guarana powder (Paullinia cupana) is a strong source of natural caffeine. Traveling long distances or staying awake for extended periods of time can drain a person of valuable energy-leaving them vulnerable. As a natural stimulant, Guarana can provide a critical boost when you need it most. Guarana powder, when kept dry, will maintain its potency for a very long time.

Valerian tincture

Even with the boost from Guarana, survivors will eventually need to sleep, but stress and adrenaline can make this a challenge. Valerian (Valeriana officinalis) tincture is a famous natural sleep aid and muscle relaxant, soothing to agitated minds and strained, sore, muscles.

In addition to a basic supply of herbal preparations, many valuable medicinal and edible herbs are available in the wild. Please note, that consuming wild plants can be quite hazardous, unless you can be absolutely certain of the identity of the plant. This list contains some common and easily identified herbs with excellent nutritional and medicinal benefits. However, this information cannot replace proper experience and knowledge when identifying wild plants.

Dandelion

The first of our wild medicinal herbs is the Dandelion (Taraxacum officinale), one of the most under appreciated plants in our society. The leaves and roots are completely edible, packed with vitamins and minerals, beneficial to the liver, and quite palatable. You have likely eaten Dandelion greens before, possibly without realizing, as it is a common salad green in restaurant and grocery store spring mixes. The flowers can be used to flavor beverages, including homemade wine.

Red Clover

Red Clover (Trifolium pratense) is a very common ground cover in the United States. It grows wild in yards, and is planted as a nitrogen-fixer in agricultural fields. The tea of Red Clover can be used to cool the body temperature in hot weather, or to break a fever. Add to your Dandelion greens for some protein rich variety to your wild crafted salad or tea.

Yarrow

Cuts, scrapes, and possibly more serious wound, will inevitably occur in a survival situation. The two most important first aid steps are to stop the bleeding, and prevent infection. Yarrow flowers (Achillea millefolium) applied directly to a wound will slow and stop bleeding. Then follow with an anti-septics from the first part of the list. Yarrow tea can dry up fluid retention and mucus inside the body during colds and flus. That same Yarrow tea can be sprayed on the skin as an insect repellent. Yarrow is not as easily identified as Dandelion and Red Clover, due to its similarity to poison Hemlock, but an experienced herbalist or woodsman can learn to spot the difference.

Mullein

Mullein (Verbascum thapsus) is common sight along highways and in fields. The flowers can be made into an excellent expectorant tea, and can help to break up coughs and sinus congestion. This tall plant can also be dried, soaked with a small amount of oil, and used as a torch to carry fire or light the way. Do not eat mullein, as the plant material is irritating to the skin, mouth, and intestines. The large leaves can be used as “toilet paper”

Elderberry

Black Elderberry ( Sambucus nigra) is the fruit of the Elder shrub, which can grow well over ten feet in the wild. In addition to a source of nutrition, Elderberry is a valuable immune system support. Eat the berries, or cook them down into a syrup to concentrate their immune boosting properties. Elderberries make a rich and flavorful fruit base for wine. The flowers can also be used to make a restorative tea. An important caution: do not eat or steep the leaves! Elder leaves, especially young leaves, contain alkaloids which can cause nausea, dizziness, and other symptoms.

Without the benefits of modern civilization, survivors of a zombie attack will be forced to turn once again to the natural foods and medicines they find around them. Fortunately, these plant medicines can be easily acquired in many areas, and can have powerful healing proper for those who know how to use them. Learn your local plants, and you will never be deprived of food or medicine, even in the most dire of zombie-related crises. Good luck out there!

Written by Sean Fay

If you want to know more about these herbs and more please visit:
Phoenix Herb Company

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sean_Fay

Zombies on Vacation

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zombie-beachDamn, that Survivor Sam!  There he goes again posting safety tips for people on vacation.  Well, what about zombies on vacation?  We like to travel, too, although it’s a little difficult for some of us.  Sometimes the TSA asks us to put our spare body parts in our travel luggage.  That’s a real pain (if I could still feel pain).

When I vacation, I still enjoy a good meal, but not at the restaurants like the rest of you.  People tend to get upset and lose their appetite when I bite into somebody’s arm at the table.  Then I get thrown out.  It’s really pretty rude to kick me out before I’ve finished eating someone.  Just more fuel for the fire in my zombie discrimination law suit.

Anyways…here’s some tip for taking your family on vacation, so I can get a decent meal when I travel.

  • Make sure you have your headphones plugged in and the volume all the way up when you tour the city.  That way you won’t hear me when stagger up from behind you.
  • Spend all your time texting and talking on the phone so you’re distracted and you won’t notice me crawling along the sidewalk before I grab your leg.
  • Pay no attention when I photo bomb your selfies.
  • Get a good tan.  Dark meat is juicer and I like it when the skin crunches.  Not too much lotion.  I have to watch my figure.
  • And, for Pete’s sake, don’t train at Matt Randall’s Black Belt Academy.  He teaches all sorts of stuff that will give you too many skills and I don’t like to work too hard for my meals. His students are the hardest for me to catch.  He’s a real pain in the butt.

Have a great time on vacation, and remember that zombies have to eat, too.

Thanks,

Tyler the Zombie

Theories of Possible Zombie Weaknesses

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Achilles’ Heel: Theories of Possible Zombie Weaknesses

howtokillazombieAchilles’ Heel: Theories of Possible Zombie Weaknesses
By Steven Mosley

So what is a Zombie? There are usually two definitions that are agreed upon by most experts. One: a Zombie is a dead human that has been reanimated to a state between life and death and its only function in life is to eat other human flesh. Two: a Zombie is a human in a death-like state, who is stripped of all human cognition, will and all other mental or spiritual faculties. It really does not matter which definition you subscribe to–what truly matters is how to capitalize on a Zombie’s possible weaknesses for the sole purpose of dispatching the creature.

Based on what is known about Zombies, the mainstream thought is that a Zombie’s only true weakness is the BRAIN. I cannot disagree with this assessment. If one causes major trauma to the brain, one will destroy the Zombie. The main concern should be to cause “severe” traumatic brain injury (TBI). A penetrating or closed (blunt) blow to the head can achieve this, and it matters not which method is used to dispatch the Zombie. The deliver the most effective strike, one should aim at the temple, the bridge of nose/eyes, or the base of the skull. Hitting one of these areas with brutal force will help ensure maximum damage. It should be noted that there are many different types of weapons that can cause TBI, and they include firearms or other projectile-style weapons, blunt or cutting implements, and/or puncturing weapons. The bottom line is this: destroying the brain destroys the Zombie.

In addition to directly destroying the brain with any of the aforementioned implements, there are additional weaknesses upon which one can capitalize: possible intermediary measures leading towards the end goal of Zombie destruction. Consider the following.

A Zombie’s eyes: in the extremely interesting paper entitled Madore’s Zombie War Doctrine, the two brothers, David and Robert, describe the blinding of a Zombie as a serious alternative to attempting a very difficult headshot with a firearm. Based on my three decades of firearms experience, I have to agree that headshots are extremely difficult, and blinding a target would seem to be much easier. According the Madore Brothers, Zombies first perceive the human shape with their eyes, and then due to the excessive production of Rhodopsin in their eyes, Zombies utilize their “infra-red heat vision” to sense the human heat signature. It stands to reason that destruction of the Zombie’s ability to see can effectively keep them from locating human prey. Nevertheless, one must keep in mind that though its ability to find human prey has been effectively shut down, without destroying the Zombie brain, it still possesses the ability to hone in on and relay other Zombies’ prey alert signals. In other words, it can continue to attract other Zombies to an area, so the Zombie must ultimately be killed as quickly as possible.

This blinding tactic can be accomplished using either a Destructive or Obstructive method. For example, destruction could be accomplished through shotgun pellets, a crossbow arrow or a pistol bullet to the eye. A simple obstructive method could be paint pellets from a paint ball gun– I particularly like this idea. Shoot the Zombie in the eyes to blind it, and then destroy its brain with some type of impact weapon; my personal preference is a Kukri knife. I believe actual field testing needs to be conducted on this new Zombie war doctrine, but I must say that based on my training experience, it can work.

Another potential weakness to exploit is the Zombie’s single-mindedness. As we all know, Zombies eat human flesh. It is all they desire. Their inability to think or do anything else can certainly be used against them. Once a Zombie pinpoints on a human, that Zombie will not stop until it reaches that prey, finds another prey, or erodes. Of course its prey alert signal will attract additional Zombies to the same location. One killing strategy could be setting up either a booby trap or an ambush for a group of Zombies. Drawing one Zombie into the trap and allowing others to follow suit could lead a sizeable horde to destruction. This is a very simple tactic that could yield a high-kill ratio.

Two additional potential weaknesses that I will mention are the act of breaking a Zombie’s jaw and cutting a Zombie’s Achilles tendon. The former affects its ability to bite, and the latter hinders its ability to move. It is my personal opinion that breaking the jaw is a waste of time. If one is going to strike the jaw area, why not just strike the entire head and achieve the ultimate desired effect of permanent brain injury? Although it requires some accuracy, the Achilles tendon, on the other hand, could be used with effectiveness. When facing multiple threats, if one can navigate towards the back of the threat, one could possibly sever the Achilles tendon. This would affect the Zombie’s mobility and afford time to regroup and destroy it at a later time. Please remember: neither of these actions will terminate a Zombie. They may slow Zombie progress, but brain trauma is the sure thing!

In the interest of fighting and destroying the menacing Zombie population, I hope that I have given you some food for thought. Unlike fully-functioning human beings, Zombies do not have many weaknesses. However, the weaknesses they do possess can be effectively exploited by adept and motivated individuals who possess proper weapons training and a winning mindset. The key is to hit first, hit fast and hit forcefully. I cannot over-emphasize that brain trauma is the sure thing for Zombie destruction. All the other weaknesses discussed are just a means to the coup de grâce!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Steven_Mosley

Can you get an STD from a Zombie?

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Zombies and Syphilis – A Myth to Explain a Disease?

Zombies and Syphilis – A Myth to Explain a Disease?

By Renee Klepzig

triple+dripperZombies have long been a fascination for Americans. From Night of the Living Dead to the Walking Dead to Dawn of the Dead, to Jane Austen and Zombies to Zombie Apocalypse, the zombie subculture is “alive” and kicking it in the millennium. Zombies have infiltrated everything from films to books to video games, cocktails, cartoons, and bands. Every October, Zombie Crawls are celebrated as people dress up as zombies in order to shuffle and stagger their way from bar to bar to drink zombies. This zombie phenomenon is not limited to Halloween. This spring, a 5K charity run is scheduled in which the runners have the added incentive to cross the finish line quickly as they will be chased by-you guessed it-zombies.

Zombies are believed to have originated in the Haitian African-American culture. Fueled by macabre voodoo rituals, dark magic revived the dead to do the bidding of those who summoned them. These walking corpses shambled forward with a stilted gait. Flesh rotted away from their bodies, and their minds could no longer formulate rational thought.

What does any of this have to do with sexually transmitted diseases? Good question. The answer may surprise you.

In 1492, Europeans brought small pox, bubonic plague, venereal disease, and religion to the New World. The New World returned the favor with syphilis.

Late stage, tertiary syphilis is syphilis that has not been treated. Spirochetes are wormlike microscopic organisms. Over the course of the disease, they multiply to the millions and lodge in most of the major organs including the brain. The human body becomes stooped and rapidly ages. Symptoms of late-stage syphilis include a jerky, stumbling step, large oozing sores, loss of tissue such as the end of the nose, and moments of euphoria followed by rage. In other words, late-stage syphilitics and zombies share many of the same traits.

Zombies originated in the New World as did syphilis. Myths develop in order to explain the otherwise unexplainable. In this instance, the zombie myth developed in order to explain syphilis, an incurable and deadly disease in pre-penicillin days. While syphilis is now treatable, it took more than 450 years to find a cure.

While the zombie myth may have arose as a way to explain a sickness, modern culture has embraced zombies. Michael Jackson’s,Thriller video of dancing zombies, remains the number one best-selling album of all time in the United States. In 2010, Asbury Park, New Jersey set the Guinness’ World Record Zombie Walk with an official 4,093 participants.

There are many ways to get an STD, and if you get one, find a location for STD Testing in Philadelphia.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Klepzig
http://EzineArticles.com/?Zombies-and-Syphilis—A-Myth-to-Explain-a-Disease?&id=7070861